New Life
by sheepy182
Summary: When Edward left Bella in new moon, Charlie sent Bella back to live with her mom. 4 months later we meet a new blond, popular Bella who is forced to move back to Forks. Who will she run into, and can she forgive and forget?
1. Ellie

**Chapter 1; BPOV**

Loud music was vibrating through the soles of my feet from the ground I stood on. My vision had become slightly fuzzy and I felt like I was on a rocking horse, sawing forward and backwards.

"_Bella please, don't do this…"_

Evan though I could feel the blackness of my high pulling my under, trying to submerge me, I could still hear his beautiful velvet clear voice. I squished my eyes while my hands balled into fists.

"_DAMMIT, go AWAY" _I screamed in my head.

The reason I drank to this point was so I could feel numb, so I wouldn't be coherent enough to hear his voice, but my high was brought to a low when I herd his voice.

A cold breeze of fresh alt air hit me and my eyes snapped open. I looked out towards the ocean with my clouded vision as a tear slipped down my cheek. I automatically wiped it away refusing to waits tears on _him_.

I lowered my gaze to look down at myself to see my arms tightly wrapped around my torso. Long blond locks of hair swayed against the wind in all directions.

I snorted and shook my head. It was hard to see any sort of resemblance between the girl that laid curled up on the forest floor to the girl that stood here. I smiled to myself. I was glad there was nothing to connect the two of us. Anything that brought me close to her was something that reminded me of _him_, and anything that reminded me of _him_ would be another thing I hated about myself. I hated that even after many drinks I could still remember his name. I hated that, every time I thought his name, I was sent to my knees. But most of all, I hated how week I was compared to him. I wanted to be his equal, I wanted to be able to keep up with him, to be able to run after him that day in the forest and catch up to him and hold him there forever. But I couldn't. After all, I was just a week human.

It was week 4 of my zombie state back in forks when Charlie had called for Renee to come and see me. All I remember was waking up from my empty shell like life in a sudden rage; throwing anything my hands could reach at the walls of my room. Renee was packing bags with my clothes, telling me that I was going back with her to her new home in Santa Barbra, California, where she and Phil had once again relocated.

Charlie ran into the room and had to grab a hold of my hands behind my back, but that didn't stop the screaming sobs that escaped my lungs.

"Bella, it's the only way. I hate to say it kiddo, but he's not coming back"

Charlie's voice was full of remorse as Renee looked at me in shock from the corner of my room where she had escaped for safety during my fit.

Charlie's prison hold on my hands loosened and I collapsed onto my bed while white feathers floated all around me.

The next morning Renee and I left Forks, Leaving Bella behind.

In an attempt to fully let go of Bella, I dyed my hair bleach blond and changed everything about myself. I didn't go by "Bella" anymore. She was dead. Instead it was Ellie.

Ellie was envied by all the girls at her new school. She had the perfect body, which was flaunted at any possible time, a thing "Bella" would never have done. Ellie loved attention and how all the guys at school drooled over her, "Bella" hated attention. The only thing that the two shared was the white skin. It was something that Ellie could never get rid of. As much as I tried, I would burn up pink, no tan. And I hated that. I hated being so white because the only other person who was this white was….

But I wouldn't let myself think of it.

"Ell"

I turned to see Trey leaning against the wall taking a drag from his cigarette. Trey was a guy in my year level at school whom I fooled around with. Nothing serious, just meeting each others needs.

He was wearing his black jeans with a fitted grey tank top that exposed his long tattoo on his right arm. With his hungry black eyes and buzz cut hair do, he almost looked dangerous.

I leaned back against the banister of the veranda making no move to approach him.

"What?"

He heaved a sigh

"you can be so stubborn sometimes you know that?"

he took on last drag before throwing his cigarette butt away. He pushed himself away from the wall and started to make his way over to me slowly.

I playfully began raising my eye brows at him and smiled.

He didn't stop till there was no room between us and roughly wrapped his arms around my waist pressing me into him. His head came down to my neck and laid a line of hungry kisses up to my jaw line where he stopped. He hands ran down to my bottom where he grabbed a firm hold before yanking me up so my legs where wrapped around his hips. He leaned us towards the banister so that I was sitting on the edge but my legs did not loosen their hold of his hips. I placed my hands around his neck to pull his face down to mine where our lips met. We kissed fiercely, knowing that this was not going to stop here. His hands made their way up under my almost see-through white top up to my black bra. I pulled away with a quiet laugh, jumping down from the banister and began walking back towards the house where the swarms of people were.

I crossed the room to the flight of stairs and looked back over my shoulder to make sure Trey was still watching. I winked at him from across the room and motioned for him to follow me with my index finger. When I reached an empty bedroom I stood behind the door waiting for Trey. When he walked in and closed the door, I pushed against his chest for him to move towards the bed. He didn't fight against it. He fell back onto the bed where I crawled on top of him and lowered myself down to his lips.

I felt his hands run through my hair and down my back, making their way to my shorts. Once at their destination, he pulled back from kissing and pulled me up roughly, his eyes were pitch black as they kept contact with mine while his hands removed my shorts and underwear. His hands slid up from my thighs to under my top where he lifted it over my head. He through it to the floor and then took of his singlet and began kissing my again. I pushed him back down onto the bed and ran my hands over his abs. I clawed my nails down his chest and he moaned in response. My hands found their way to his pants where they tugged at then to come off. Treys hands grabbed the sides of my face and drew my face back up to his. His lips crushed to mine and soon he rolled us over so he was on top. He pulled away with a smile which was mirrored in my expression. He closed his eyes as he inserted into me. I felt the tightness of him taking up all the room as he began moving up and down inside of me. I pushed him over so I was on top and began a rocking sensation. A moan came from my lips as I herd Trey moan my name in response. And then the game really started…


	2. Reaction to him

**Chapter 2;**

When I walked down the flight of stairs, I saw masses of bodies moving as one in time to the music. I walked over to the kitchen where I saw Logan sculling her cruiser.

"Logan!" I yelled, but got no response. The music was too loud.

Once I was right behind her I taped her shoulder. This time she noticed me. She turned around.

"HEY!!!!" she screamed half drunk, throwing her arms around my neck.

"Look, I've got to go alright?"  
Logan looked over my shoulder where she saw Trey leaning against the kitchen counter. Her eyes came back to me and she smirked.

"Will you guys just go out already? OMG everyone knows that you guys ALWAYS hook up!"  
I smiled and shook my head.

"It's not as fun that way" I said and kissed her cheek. "See you Tomorrow, oh and have fun explaining to dear daddy what happened while he was away."

With that Trey led me out to his black Range Rover where he drove me back to my house.

We pulled up in front of my house and I looked at the clock on the dashboard which read 3am. I unbuckled my seat belt and jumped out of the car.

"Thanks for tonight" I looked back at him before closing the door.

He smiled

"For you, anytime." He said with a big grin.

"see you tomorrow" I smiled and closed the door.

I could tell that I was still a bit out of it as I made my way up our steep driveway, trying not to trip over. I still couldn't stand straight without tripping even when I was sober. Another "Bella" thing.

The lights in my house where all out, so I guessed Renee and Phil were asleep, but when I turned around after closing the door, the lights flicked on to life.

"ISABELLA MARIE SWAN! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN THIS EARLY IN THE MORNING?"

great… Hitler was awake.

"Logan's"

"Why do you smell of alcohol and….IS THAT SMOKE? BELLA, PLEASE DON'T TELL ME YOU WERE DOING DRUGS DAMMIT!"

"MOM, NO! now leave me alone"

I pushed past her and started to make my way to my bedroom.

"_What happened to you Bella?"_ a sob escaped my mom's lips. I stopped dead in my tracks.

"_This is in response to him isn't it?"_ her chest started to heave.

I turned sharply to look at her. "NO! THIS ISNT BECAUSE OF _HIM_, THIS IS WHO I AM! WHY DOES EVERYTHING I DO HAVE TO BE IN RESPONSE TO _HIM!"_ I turned back around and bolted for my room, slamming and locking the door behind me. I ran and flopped onto my bed. Cries began to make their way out of my mouth and soon the hole in my chest started to expand. It was hard to breathe, I was gasping for air, but there was nothing. Soon the blackness overcame me and I was pulled under, into my nightmare.


	3. Charlie

**Chapter 3;**

The next morning I woke up, got dressed and walked out the door just like every other morning. The day at school progressed just the same. Logan's party from the previous night was the talk of the school and of course, it had taken its toll on a few people. Logan especially, she had turned up that morning with her pitch black sunny's. I stood against my old black BMW of a box while Logan's flashy grey jeep pulled into the space next to me.

"Dude, I am NEVER having a party like that again… ahhhhh, my head hurts soooo much!" she was dragging her feet towards me with one hand rubbing her left temple.

"how late did you get to bed anyway?" I asked

Logan looked up at me with a sly smile.

"who said I went to bed?"

just then the bell rang, Logan's yelped in surprise and her hands flew up to cover her ears.

"ok, so today is officially, not going to be so great"

I laughed at her expression and followed her as she walked off to class.

After school finished I drove home only to be surprised when I found someone's car in my spot outside the house. That was strange, I didn't recall Renee saying anyone was coming over.

Once I walked into the house I heard a mumble of talking stop. I looked towards the kitchen when I heard a stool being pushed out, followed by heavy foot steps. They kept walking down the hall until they meet the entry way.

"Charlie?" I asked shocked.

"DAD!, oh dad, I've missed you!" I ran and through myself at him and I herd a deep chuckle in return.

"Bells, how are yah kiddo?"

"mmm, yer, alright. What are you doing here? Did you know about this mom?"

I looked towards Renee who wore a sheepish expression.

"Bella, I think we need to have a talk, would you come into the kitchen please honey?"

curious, I looked at my mother and farther, but followed them down the hallway. They both took a seat, I noticed Phil sitting at the table too, he took Renee's hand in his as she took in a raged breath.

"Mom, what's going on?" my voice shaky with fear with what was making her so upset.

"Bella honey, I think its time you move back to Forks…" Her eyes stayed locked on the table, refusing to meet my gaze.

"_What?"_ I wasn't sure they heard it, I barely did, it came out as a whisper. "_no…_NO! YOU CAN'T JUST SEND ME BACK THERE!"

"Bells, please, I don't know what to do anymore, you don't come home till late or sometimes not at all, you drink till you cant remember what happened the previous night, and last night you come home stinking of SMOKE!" she scream the last word, appalled by my behavior as of late.

"Bella, we brought you here so you could move on, but you haven't love, you've just rebelled. I don't know who you are anymore…" and with that, the sobs began.

I had no idea that I was causing my mother this much pain. Phil pulled her in to a tight hug and rubbed her back soothingly.

Tears welled up in my eyes. I didn't want to see her like this, I didn't want her to suffer with me.

I took a deep breathe.  
"_fine…I'll go."_ And with that whisper, I felt the hole in my chest begin to ache.


	4. Forks

**Chapter 4;**

The car pulled up to a very familiar looking house with a big red rusty truck sitting in front of it. I turned to look at Charlie with a raised eye brow.

"I wasn't sure if you still wanted it or not, so I kept it. Just in case" he never made eye contact with me.

I looked back to the truck. "Thanks"

It still only took one trip to get all my stuff upstairs to my bedroom, but as soon as Charlie left my room and closed the door behind him, hunted memories of a time when I was happy started coming back to me. I flopped onto my bed and buried my head in my pillow to try and muffle my cries.

I woke up the next morning to the heavy grey skies outside my window. Great, cold weather again. I had a quick shower and dried my hair so it hung down my back in its natural lose curls. Standing in front of my wardrobe I considered my clothing options. I decided I would go with a long sleeved cream top with a black military styled leather jacket, paired with my black skinny legs and above the knee grey boots. Looking at the time, I grabbed my grey handbag and ray bans and ran out the door.

Driving towards school was nerve raking. The whole way there, I was thinking of peoples reactions. Would they recognize me? Would there be some crazy rumor flying around as to why I had disappeared for four months?

As I pulled into the school parking lot, I notice people turn their heads in my direction.

"Here we go again" I said to my self.

I got out and started making my way to the office. When I was almost there I noticed a group of people staring at me with wide opened mouths. I looked a bit closer and noticed Jessica, Mike, Eric, Angela and all the others sitting against their cars, looking right at me.

I didn't stop to say hello, I just turned my head back, ignored them and kept walking. I wasn't ready to face them yet.

As I walked into the office, miss coup looked up at me questioningly. I slipped my ray bans to sit on top of my head and walked up to her.

"Hey miss coop, it's me, Isabella swan. I'm here for my class schedule?"

she looked at me shocked.  
"Oh my Bella! I almost didn't recognize you." She laughed at her self a little before shuffling through a pile of papers and picking some out.

"Here you are love. You'll be keeping the same schedule as before, alright?"

I nodded and said thanks and walked off to my first class, calculus.

I was the last one to walk into class, so I walked up to Mr. Varner and handed him my slip.

"Ahhh, Bella, good to see you again, please take a seat."

I Looked towards the back of the room and noticed an empty table. Score. Today must be my day. I walked to back and took my seat while my class mates stole glances at me.

Class was long and boring, but soon the bell rang, releasing me from this torture. I grabbed my bad and headed straight for the cafeteria.

As I was in line for my food, I heard a lot of people whispering around me. Feeling self-conscious, I slid my ray bans back over my eyes. I didn't want to notice anyone. As I was paying for my food I over herd someone behind me whispering.

"_Funny how first they come back and then she does hey?" _My head snapped up.

_What?_ _No Isabella, your just being paranoid. It's all in your head._

I turned around to look for a table. Table after table I notice two things. One, people staring at me and two, the table was not free. My eyes flicked over the faces of my "past: friends and as I moved to another table I froze.

I felt as if the wind had been knocked out of me and I let out a gush of air.

"_shit_" it was barely a whisper, but I was sure they had caught it.

Five sets of gold eyes looked at me.

I had spent 4 months building up Ellie, building up walls around me, to protect me from people like them, and in as little as 4 seconds, those walls had crumbled to pieces.

My hands loosened their grip on my lunch try. _Crash._

My hands know held onto nothing.

"_Obviously not" _I vaguely heard a voice whisper from behind me.

After looking down at my food all over the floor, I brought my eyes back p to meet their gazes. My eyes narrowed. I refused to meet the gaze of one of them and couldn't stand their shocked gazes anymore. I turned around and stalked off to an empty table.

I was playing with my nails when I herd the chair across from me scrap against the floor.

"_Bella?"_ I ignored the beautiful voice.

"Bella, _please,_ answer me."

I kept playing with my nails.

"Bella!" I herd a growl.

I looked up to locking my eyes on a pixie sized female.

"It's _Ellie_ now." I sneered.

I shoved my seat back so it hit the floor with a loud thud and walked off to my next class. I only hoped that _they_ didn't have the same schedules as last time too, because that would mean I had biology with _him…_

I was the first to walk in, so I took a table at the very back and once again, turned my full attention back to my nails. It was something that I often did now to try and distract myself when I was nerves.

Just then, the room started to fill up with people taking their seats.

I herd it when the seat next to me was pulled out and sat in, I was just too afraid to look over. The smell hit me like a ton of bricks.

It was _his_ smell, a smell that I would know anywhere. It was an almost-honey-lilac-and-sun-flavored scent.

I could feel his gaze on me, but I refused to look his way.

"Bella?"

I didn't break my vowel of silence. He let out a gust of frustrated air. Clearly he finally understood that I wasn't going to respond.

The rest of class past with a blur. I continued to ignore _him_ and his stupid "_Bella?"_ letters.

When the bell finally rang to sound end of the school day, I got up quickly, grabbing my books and heading for the door but then something ice cold grabbed a hold onto my arm and I froze mid stride.

"Bella stop and _listen _to me" his voice came out coated with sadness.

I yanked my arm away, spun around to face him, and although I knew it wouldn't hurt him physically, I threw my books at him.

"GET AWAY FROM ME!" I ran out the door.

I was halfway to my car when I noticed a Black Range Rover in the car park. Leaning against the car was a tall blonde and a guy with a buzz cut.

"TREY!" I ran up into his opened arms where he lifted me up and placed his lips firm to mine.

"You must have really missed me then" he let out a little chuckle.

"_You have no idea"_ I mumbled against his lips.

"_awwwwwwwww_ ELLIE!!!!" I turned to see Logan jumping up and down with joy.

Tears welled up in my eyes.

"Logan, I missed you so much" she pulled me in for a tight embrace.

"what are you guys doing here?" I asked confused

"Your mom told me how you'd move back to your dads, and like we knew you didn't "want" to come because you always used to talk about how much you hated it, so we decided to come and save you!" she had a massive grin on her face.

"Logan, what were you thinking about?" I was worried now.

"Oh nothing, just a short trip back home. I'm sure daddy wont mind you sleeping at my house."

"Logan, my dad will flip! Did you miss the part where I said he was the chief of police? there's no way that would ever work!"

Trey came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, sliding them down to my hips. He leaned into my ear and I could feel his hot breath on my neck.

"come on babe, you were such the risk taker back home." He moved hips lips down to my shoulder and started to lay kisses there.

Once minute I was enjoying the feeling of his warm lips against my skin, and then they were gone. There was a loud crash noise. My eyes flew open to see Trey pined up against his car by _him._

"WHAT THE HELL! TREY!" I threw myself at _him_ pounding on his back. "LET HIM GO JERK! LET HIM GO!" he didn't loosen his hold.

"_Edward please…"_ it was the first time I had said his name in a long time, and it ripped the hole wide open. I clutched my chest and sobbed.

"_please…"_ I begged again.

Edward looked back at me with hurt in his eyes. He let go but didn't look away from me. His hand started to reach for my face but I pulled away shaking my head. Tears began to well up in my eyes. He reached his hand out once more to wipe away a tear. I didn't move this time.

"_Bella…"_

I shook my head trying to clear it.

"I said it was Ellie" I looked up straight into his eyes. "Bella doesn't exist anymore"

I turned away and walked straight past Trey and Logan for my truck and drove back to Charlie's.


	5. Cure

The whole drive home I cursed myself for losing my grip and shedding those few tears that _he_ wiped away from my cheeks.

I brought my hand up to them where his cold touch left a burning sensation. It stung letting him touch me, and I knew I would play for it even more in my dreams tonight. there was only one way I knew how to cure this, and that involved ransacking the house for some alcohol.

As soon as I pulled into the driveway, I was out of the car, making a run for it to the house when I lost grip on the soled ground below me. In an effort to catch myself before hitting the ground, I reached out to a nearby bush.

What I didn't take into account was how prickly this bush was.

Startled by the bushes prickles, my arm flinched away from it, causing myself to fall flat on my ass on the cold, wet ground.

"ughh" I let out a grunt.

My hand was slightly stinging so I lifted it up to inspect the damage.

I had a few deep cuts from my tight grip on the bush, and now blood was flowing out of my hand.

My head started to feel week as a rusty smell invaded my nose.

I closed my eyes and tried to breathe deeply to calm myself down.

"_It's alright. It's only a small cut. It'll heal in no time!" _I chanted to myself.

I lifted myself off the ground and carefully made my way into the house to find a bandage.

After I had fixed my hand up, I then began my hunt for some drinks.

The fridge was the first stop. Charlie being a big beer drinker, had a few stashed away there, but I was sure he would notice if I took a few, so I moved on to the pantry. Nothing. I then began shuffling through the cupboards. Still nothing. Going down onto my knees, I looked under the sink.

Pushing a few cleaning products aside, I found what I was looking for. I pulled out a clear bottle of vodka with a brown picture or a head Indian on it.

I smiled to myself, mission accomplished.

I put all the cleaning products back and grabbed the bottle of vodka, making a run for it to my room. I quickly hid the vodka under my bed and ran back downstairs to prepare dinner for Charlie.

After awhile I heard the cruiser pull into the driveway and Charlie make his way to the house. I served up his lamb chops and sat down at the table with my tomato soup.

I heard the door open followed by heavy foot steps.

"I'm home" Charlie yelled as he hung up his coat.

"Hey kiddo" he said as he came around the corner into the kitchen.

"hey" I nodded in return.

Charlie sat down at the table and got straight into his dinner.

"I'm done, I'm going to bed, I had a long day and I'm tired." I picked up my half eaten soup and cleaned the bowl.

"you didn't even finish your dinner? What's wrong Bells?"

I looked over to see Charlie looking worries at me. I sighed.

"Look, it's just been a big day alright. I mean what do you expect? You force me to Santa Barbara for 4 months and then all of the sudden I'm thrown back here. You cant except me to just act all happy and fit right back in! Hell, I didn't even fit in well the first time! I just need some rest ok." I took a seep breath.

Charlie's face was shocked. It was the most I had said to him in one sentence since I'd moved back.

I turned away and walked up to my bedroom.

I closed the door behind me and walked quickly over to my bed retrieving my hidden vodka from before. I eagerly took a sip and sighed in content.

I had taken a fond likeness to vodka while I was in Santa Barbra and as a result of my heavy drinking, I didn't feel a thing at the moment.

I went over to my window and opened it feeling the cold air rush in.

I took a deep breath as I stood there, tears welling up in my eyes.

If he still cared, this simple gesture would of meant that he was coming over for he night, like he always used to.

My hart ached with pain as the hole in my chest began to resurface again.

I laid back on my bed and stared up at the roof. The bottle of vodka was almost empty now, and I could it taking its toll. I felt tears stream down my cheeks as my eyes wondered around my room. Everywhere they landed sent another wave of memories with _him.  
_I stiffed a sob when they landed on the rocking chair, thinking of all the nights that _he_ used to rock me to sleep in his lap.

My hart was pounding and my breathing was turning into hyperventilating.

My hands fisted around my quilt and I pulled my quilt over my head, not wanting my eyes to bring me anymore unpleasant memories.

My eyes were becoming droopy and I knew I couldn't put it off any longer, so I gave in. I let the darkness of my night take me as I succumbed to my nightmares.

**EPOV**

It was 3AM in the morning, so I was sure Bella would be asleep.

I was desperate to see her, but I knew she would never hear of it during school. It hurt me deep down to see the anger that flooded into her eyes whenever she saw me.

It killed me to see the lengths she had gone to try and forget me. She isn't the same Bella anymore. I didn't understand this new "Ellie" girl. She isn't the same quiet shy Bella I once knew. I wanted for her to move on, not drown in her own sorrows.

I ran through the woods with the wind whipping around me.

I slowed down as I came closer to Bella's house. I stayed hidden in the trees for a few moments as I searched the minds of the neighbors to see if anyone was awake.

They were all asleep. Dreaming, a thing I could never do.

I looked up to Bella's bedroom to find her window open.

This surprised me. She only left her window open as a welcome note to me, in fact, she hated the cold air that would blow into her room when it was open.

I ran across the road and jumped up the tree to leap through her window.

I planted my feet softly so as to not wake her.

I brought my gaze upwards to find her sleeping in her bed.

Blonde soft curly hair was sprawled out everywhere over her pillow, even covering her face. She kept flinching in bed, as if she was having a bad dream.

I wanted nothing more than to look into that hidden mind of hers so I could see what she was feeling.

I looked over to where the rocking chair sat and went over to take my spot where I once sat every night, watching over her.

I started to think of ways I could apologize to her, though I knew that nothing would ever be good enough, nothing could compare to how sorry I was, nothing could even show it, or how strongly I felt for her. I was already researching about were she was before she came back. I was trying to keep tabs on her, so I knew she would be safe, but I knew that if I kept following her, then I wouldn't be able to keep myself hidden from her in the shadows. The pull I feel to her would have been to strong and at some point I was sure I would of snapped and ran up to her and wrapped her into a protective hug.

My thoughts were distracted when I herd Bella mumble in her sleep.

"_Edward, please…"_

Her chest started to heave as if she was having trouble breathing.

"_Edward, please! DON'T LEAVE ME!"_

I jumped up in surprise of her scream.

I began to panic; she was trashing herself around in the bed, screaming over and over again.

I rushed over to her side as dry sobs began to escape my lips. My hands franticly hovering above her, confused about what they should do.

"_Bella, I'm so sorry, please, I'm sorry." _I began to whisper repeatedly

Her screams became louder.

"_EDWARD" _tears were streaming down her cheeks.

I brushed her blonde hair out of her face and placed my hands on either side of her face.

"Love, it's ok, I'm here."

I felt her flinch under my touch as I tried to sooth her.

I herd a grunt come from down the herd, followed by heavy footsteps that were dragging along the floor beds. I looked up to the door knob at the same time that it started to turn. I jumped up taking one last look at Bella, as her eye lids were about to open, and jumped out of her window before she could see me.

"_Bella? Bells, its okay, clam down, it was just a bad dream…"_

I ran off into the woods happy with the fact the Bella had at lest one person who was still there for her every night.

Oh, how much I wished it could have been me.

**BPOV**

My eyes fluted and I jolted upright in my bed.

"Bella? Bells, its okay, clam down, it was just a bad dream."

Charlie came rushing into my bedroom and sat on the bed with me.

My breathing was still coming quickly as my hart pounded.

"Yeh, just another really bad one." I whispered to lowly for Charlie to catch.

I ran my hands through my hair and sighed.

"I'm sorry dad, I didn't mean to wake you." I looked up over to see Charlie hunched over with droopy eyes.

"S'ok kiddo, just making sure your alright." He began to slightly sway from his tiredness. His hand reached out onto my bed to steady himself.

"Thanks dad" I slightly smiled.

"Now go back to bed before you collapse on mine. I'll be fine."

Charlie looked over at me through squinty eyes and nodded with a hum.

I watched as he got up and tugged his feet along the floor beds towards his bedroom.

When Charlie was gone I brought my hands up to my cheeks and shook my head.

My dream had been of the day when _Edward_ had taken me into the forest to leave me…

It was always the same.

I would picture him saying goodbye, and then me running after him, but finding nothing.

It always ended in a scream.

I felt my cheeks again as they stung from the cold crisp air.

The feel of them reminded me of something else that used to rest upon them.

A cold touch.

I sighed in content for the moment as I closed my eyes, resting back down on my bed while imagining _his_ cold touch floating along my cheeks.

**A/N: Please review and tell me what you think. Your thoughts are greatly appreciated. I hope you guys are all enjoying the story and thank you soooo much for reading it. **

**Sorry if updates are slow, I'm in year 12, and Homework is a bit stressful, but I will try to update as much as I can, please be patient. **


	6. Oblivious

**Chapter 6;**

I smiled as I woke up to cold gray skies of Forks.

Surprisingly, after last nights repeated nightmare, it was the best sleep I had in a long time.

Letting out a yawn while stretching in my bed, I rolled over on my side to see the time.  
"_SHIT!"  
_7:45, there's my reason for complete content and lateness to school.

Jumping out of bed and just narrowly missing a trip to the hospital by grabbing the door handle before face planting into the floorboards, I ran into the bathroom, brushed my teeth, quickly applied some mascara and looked into the mirror.

I really need to work on setting that alarm clock.

I didn't even bother with my hair deciding to just leave it in its naturals curls and made a run back to my bedroom stumbling around for clothes.

Hoping around my room like a mad man, I was finally dressed wearing a blue and white long sleeved stripy top with my purple suede jacket and blue skinny's.  
I pulled my grey suede above the knee boots on again and ran down the stairs into the kitchen to grab a granola bar before bolting out the door to my truck.

7:59  
"_awwwww crap!"_

My truck roared to life as it slowly made its way down the main highway to school.

It was 8:10 when I pulled into the school car park with thanks to my under 50 speed limit. Looking for a free car park I came across two problems. 1. The car park was full with the exception of one park. 2. That car park was two down from a certain shiny sliver Volvo.  
"This is just not my day" I whined to myself before pulling into the park.

Once parked, I jumped out of my truck and made a run for it towards 1st period English.  
Running down the hallway towards class I lost grip of the floor beneath myself and slammed into the classroom door.  
All I could think of at that point was a brainless bird flying into a glass sliding door repeatedly.

I was red in the face when I opened the door to an angered Mr. Berty. Sliding past him I mumbled my apologizes and noticed that the only free table was seconded from the back. Bonus. And directly in front of Edward. Minus.

I sighed and took my seat while feeling his gaze burning a whole in the back of my head. I shuffled in my seat a few times uncomfortable with the fact that he could see me, but I couldn't see him.

I felt the invisible pull towards him, my body wanted to twist around and gaze endlessly into those topaz eyes of Adonis.

_**No.**_  
I new once I looked into those eyes the wall that I had built up would begin to crumble. I jumped when I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket suddenly.

"_Hey sweetie,  
sorry about yesterday with Trey_

_We were a bit anxious to see you._

_Anyway, we're still in town, _

_Give me a buzz and we'll meet you._

_Logan xx."  
_

I smiled.  
Logan was really the only true friend I had been able to make while I was away. She honestly cared for me, but at the same time, was the life of the party. It baffled me sometimes that she could be so sincere.

"_Hey,  
don't worry I'm fine,_

_It was just unexpected._

_Meet at school again and_

_You can follow me home.  
Ellie."_

Just as I was sending the text, the bell for lunch rang.

I got up and packed all my books away into my bag and turned to walk towards the door only to stumble over my own feet and fall towards the ground. I sucked in a breath of air and squeezed my eyes closed waiting to hit the floor. I let out a yelp when I was suddenly pulled to a stop by the feel of two cold hands wrapped tightly around my wrists.

I stayed like that for a few moments as I felt the pull towards him increase with the feel of electric currents running over my arms from our connection. Soon I felt him pulling me back up onto my feet, but I never opened my eyes.

"Bella?"  
The sweet velvet sound of his voice took me off guard and I soon found myself looking deeply into his Topaz eyes.

My breath came out in a whoosh.

Out of the corner of my eyes I could see his hand slowing making its way to caresses my cheek. I turned my face away from it breaking eye contact in the same movement.

"Don't, _please_. I don't think I could bare it." The whisper escaped my lips.

Edward pulled his hand back quickly.  
"Bella, please. I need to talk to you, i…I need to explain things…set things straight. _Please_ I need to tell you-"His voice was pained and I couldn't stand to hear it anymore.

"Edward stop! I mean it. I can't…take this anymore. _You…you lef..." _I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes as I struggled to get the words out.  
I clutched my waist, pulling closer into myself. I could feel the hole in my chest beginning to rip wide open.  
I was struggling to breath now, and I could hear the loud gasps I made while trying to suck in oxygen, barely succeeding.

My thick brick wall was no longer thick; in fact, it was crumpling, just like me. I felt my legs give way as a cry escaped my lips.

Before I could fall completely to the floor, a pair of cold arms reached out and embraced me.

"_Bella, I'm so sorry, please forgive me. Please Bella I'm sorry."_ I could feel his body shake as his words came out weak.  
That's was it. I had showed him how vulnerable I really was in front of him. As cries continued to escape me, I shook my head.  
"No, I will not fall for this trick! You just feel bad because I'm crying! We both know you don't love me Edward, you said so yourself that day in the forest, so don't lie to me anymore! I…I CANT TAKE IT!" I thrashed around in his arms, yelling into his chest. I looked up into his eyes and saw the shocked expression that was placed on his face. It looked wrong, he shouldn't be in pain.

His hands weakened and I threw myself from his grip, ran out the door into the empty hallway and down towards the girl's bathroom.

I ran into the first free toilet cubical I could see and slammed the door behind me. My body began to tremble with the force of my cries as tears fell down my red hot cheeks. I cupped my hands over my mouth to muffle to strangled sounds escaping my lips. My back was leaning against the door of the cubical and slowly started to slide down towards the floor.  
I stayed like that, huddled in on myself like a ball, on the toilet floor for the rest of the period.  
When the bell rang to signal lunch I had finally composed myself while hating myself for making such a scene over _him._

I walked out of the toilets showing no trace of my momentary breakdown. I felt his presence before his cold hands pulled me to a stop in the middle of the hallway, right in front of everyone.

"Bella-"  
I turned around showing no emotion on my face except pure anger as I glared into his eyes.  
"Edward how many times do I have to tell you? **Don't. Touch. Me."** I ripped my hand out of his and turned on my heels towards the cafeteria ignoring all the shocked whispers floating around the hallway.

I pushed through the cafeteria door, got a bottle of lemonade and made my way to an empty table. As I sat there playing with the lid of the bottle I herd the chair opposite me pull out. Huffing a sigh I looked up to see who it was.

"So, Bella's back!" Jessica sat grinning at me widely.

"err, hey Jess" I looked back down to my drink.

"Oh you know, same old, same old. But enough about me, where have you BEEN!"  
I could see Jess jumping in her seat fishing for the latest gossip.  
I smirked.  
"Oh well, I ahh…moved back in with my mom, in Santa Barbra for a bit. Nothing interesting really." I looked around the cafeteria, not wanting to meet her eyes. I would not let it slip that I was forced to move back with my mother, only to be forced back to Forks a few months later.

"Nothing?...Really?...I mean, I hardly call going away for what, four months was it? And then coming back looking like a complete stranger with your blonde hair and new style, nothing. _Something_ happened and I know it. _Come on_, you can tell me. And who was that guy from yesterday? Oh my Bella Swan, you have definitely _not_ been up to nothing." She shock her head while clicking her tongue with her arms crossed against her chest.  
I just stared at her with my mouth hung open.  
"umm, jess look I've gotta go alright." I stood up and quickly made my way out the cafeteria into the parking lot leaving behind a confused Jessica, whom I could bet, was already buzzing with a million rumors that she could make up about my disappearance.

I Decided I would just sit in my truck reading and almost made it to my destination before a steel lock grasped my hands. Anger pulsed through me.  
"Look Edward just leave me-" I sharply turned around to face to face with a Vampire alright, but not Edward.  
"_Jasper…"_ I slightly cringed away. I knew I never blamed him for what happened at my Birthday party, but the fact that he was standing here, in front of me, right now, was too much. I couldn't deal with anyway of them right now. I had already broken down once today and right in front of the one person whom I wished I wouldn't. but to do it again in front of Jasper, would only make himself feel that much more worse than he already did.

"Bella I…I wanted to say _sorry_ for last…" he heaved a sigh as he let go of my arm, adjusting his eye sight to the ground.

"Jasper don't worry about it, please don't."  
His eyes suddenly connected back with mine, confusion clearly written across his face.  
"_Why?..._ I mean, _why_ shouldn't I? I almost _killed_ you Bella!"

"Because nothing more was excepted of you. It's who you are jasper. You feel everyone's feelings around you, and when I…" The hole was coming back once again as I thought back to the events of that night.

"When I_ cut_ myself…it wasn't just your bloodlust you felt, but everyone's…including Edwards." He looked at me shocked.

"I don't blame _you _Jasper. I never did." A glum smile crossed my face as my eyes drifted towards the ground. I kicked my foot in a near-by puddle feeling the need to do something, the conversation felt awaked.

"_Bella,_ you have no idea how much pain I've caused. I've had to live through it everyday-"  
To my own delight, Jasper was interrupted mid sentence by the bell for class. I didn't think I could stand to hear any more of what he had to say, afraid of the direction the conversation would take.

"Ahhh…I'll see you later Jasper." I turned around and walked briskly to class.

Before I knew it, school was over and I was walking back towards my truck when I saw an all too familiar Range Rover parked in the car park.

I could see Edward and his family standing around his car out of the corner of my eye,  
so I knew my next action wouldn't fool Edward very well since he would be able to hear my feelings through Jasper, but I knew just the look of it would drive him insane.

Trey stepped out of his car only to lean back against the door, with his eyes searching. They stopped when they found mine, his face turned up into a smug expression as I walked over to stand in front of him.

I dropped my bag to the ground next to us, not caring if it would get wet and pushed him up against the car leaning into him until I could feel him press into me. My hands ran up his arms, over his biceps and found their way to his neck where they stayed locked.

I could feel his own hands as they trailed down my back to grip my hips as he leaned his head down to my neck to plant a kiss.  
I pulled his head back up as I leaned in to kiss him fiercely but slowly wanting to drag it out as long as I could. I let my left hand run down his chest to slowly graze over his bulge as he moaned into my mouth.

"_I missed you"_ I whispered against his lips.

"_hmmmm, me too babe_."

I pulled back slightly and began playing with his T-shirt with my free left hand.  
"Where's Logan?" I didn't look up into his eyes. They weren't the ones I wanted to see. I felt Trey sigh and slump further back onto his car.

"I dropped her off down at the supermarket, she needed to get some things. We've gotta pick her up on our way to yours."

"huh, ok, well I guess follow me to pick her up and then we can go back to my house?" I looked back up to Treys face to see him looking over my shoulder towards something.  
"yeah sure, just tell me who that guy is from yesterday? I don't like the way he's looking at you right now…" I stiffened in Treys arms. Even before he mentioned it, I could tell who he was looking at.

I turned my head around to see Emmet and Jasper with a firm hold on each of Edwards shoulders. To anyone else, it would seem natural, but I knew better. They were holding him in place to stop him from doing anything rash that could expose them. I only looked at Edwards face for a few moments, but it was enough to catch a few expressions; Anger, hate and…sadness? I smirked back at him quickly before turning back around to embrace Trey, kissing his neck, slowly making my way up to his jaw and then his lips. I felt his warm breath as he parted his lips. I lightly traced my tong on his bottom lip before nibbling it softly.

I placed one last quick peck on his lips before I pulled back to see his massive grin.  
As I bent down to pick up my bag, I let my right hand slid down the left side of his body, stopping on his upper thigh, very close to his bulge. He let out a groan. I picked up my bag and rose back up to face him.  
"See you soon" I turned right on my heel hearing him whine to him self about me always leaving too soon.

Walking towards my car I could feel all of their gazes on me. My hart kept chanting "just one look, come on, just one quick look", but I couldn't do it. If I did, I knew I would give in to them. But what would I be giving into? Edward had made it clear that he didn't _love_ me anymore. I was nothing but a distraction for him, a pet.

I yanked open the door to my truck and roared it to life, backing out of my space slowly.

As I was driving out of the school parking lot, my hart got the better of me as I glanced into the review merrier.  
_Edward…_  
suddenly I wished it was the little sliver car following me and not the Range Rover.

**A/N: sorry, from now on, uploads will take some time. BUT reviews would be most welcome; hint hint. They make my day, and I would love to hear what you guys think about the story or where you think it should go. Thanks for reading.**


End file.
